I don’t need feminism…

I read this with some interest this morning I Don’t Need Feminism. (Yes, I know it’s the Daily Fail Mail, which I read purely for the comedy value!). The girls featured in the article are being criticised by feminists but I couldn’t help but think that to an extent I agree with them.

Feminism is a movement which seeks to achieve equality for females. By that definition, the real definition, then of course we need feminism. If we didn’t, life would be pretty crap for us girls. We would be living in 18th century times,  with women unable to make choices, unable to vote or have their voices hears. Because of feminism, I was able to go to school and get a good education, go to university and train as a teacher. Because of feminism I can wear what I want. Because of feminism I can do whatever I want (as long as it’s legal!). Because of feminism I can can write this blog. So yes, I do need feminism.

However, the girls in this anti-feminist campaign seem to be speaking out against a different form of feminism. A type of feminism that sadly seems to be becoming more and more popular (or so it seems). This sort of feminism (which I’m going to call ‘scary feminism’) gives real feminism a bad name, and I certainly don’t want or need it.

Scary feminists are the bra-burning, don’t shave your legs, man-hating ones. They seem to believe that men are bad and to be blamed for everything, and women are superior rather than equal. I don’t need THAT feminism.

I am a female. I really don’t give a flying monkey whether you call me a female, girl, woman, lady. I’m not offended by any of them. I’ve chosen to leave my fairly decent job as a teacher to be a stay at home mum. These scary feminists would have a field day with that. I was the main earner, yet I chose to stay at home? Surely not. I MUST have felt under pressure from a patriarchal society to fulfill a traditional female role. Bollocks. I chose to stay at home because I wanted to, and it was my decision. Spend my days playing with my kids or worrying about levels and targets? Easy decision. A real feminist would be pleased that I made that decision, that I had the choice. In fact, I pretty much told my other half (yes, scary feminists, I do call him my other half. It’s an affectionate saying, nothing to do with me not being a complete person without a male or anything like that!) that was what I was going to do. I’m pretty sure he would have loved being a stay at home dad whilst I went to work.

If a man holds a door open for me, or gives up a seat for me, I think nothing of it, other than how polite and well mannered he is. If I got wolf whistled at or complimented in the street, I’d actually be rather chuffed. I don’t get the whole issue about females wearing very little in films and music videos, regardless of their singing/acting abilities. I would quite happily sit through a film in mute if I knew there was scenes with Jason Statham or Tom Hardy topless in it. I really couldn’t care less if they were any good at acting, I just want to perve.  It would be hypocritical to say I would have a problem with a bloke doing the same. To me, that is feminism – we are able to do the same as men.

When it comes to jobs, maybe I’m ignorant, but I really find it hard to think of any jobs where a man and a woman doing exactly the same job would paid differently. I know when I was teaching we were all in pay scales, so your pay depended on your responsibility and experience and gender had nothing to do with it. In the senior management team, there were both males and females. My dad works in a car factory which is mostly male but there are women working there, and they get paid exactly the same as the men. There is a lot in the press about places such as these, and science based jobs such as engineering not having many females. Instead of assuming it’s anything to do with it being male dominated, have they ever stopped to think that women just might not want to do it. I would hate a job in engineering or anything like that – gender has never crossed my mind, I’m just not interested! Scary feminists don’t really seem to give females credit for using their own minds and making their own decisions. Instead, they think we are all easily swayed by men, and actually, that’s really derogatory against us. Let’s just give men credit for a minute – what if they are actually naturally better at some jobs than women? Some argue that men are more suited for technical and physical jobs, women for more caring jobs. It’s certainly not the case for everyone, granted, but if it’s true, should we discriminate against a male who would be better at a job than a female, so as to make it fair? I wouldn’t expect most women to be as effective on a building site as men, because generally, they’re not physically as strong. That’s biology, not society. In the same way,I think there are certain jobs where women dominate and are probably more suited to than a male, such as midwifery.

We absolutely do not need ‘feminists’ who are anti men and have a superiority complex. They’re not real feminists. They use feminism for their own agenda. What we do need are real feminists who want equality for women,and I think they’re doing pretty well at that in the Western world – although sadly not the case for many parts of the world. These girls need to educate themselves as to what feminism really is about, not what a bunch of scary women or the media say it is about.

A quote from a friend of mine which sums it all up for me:

I’ve never burnt a bra (they’re too expensive!), I own razors and love men (mostly!) but I’m still a feminist…feminists need more strong, sexy, aspirational females like Beyonce, who are not afraid to call themselves feminists and be proud of the fact”